The fundamentals of emotions

We take for granted the inherent messenger system we carry inside us, as we try with all our might to expel it from our awareness. Troublesome little beasts they are, and yet, for all their trouble, emotions, believe it or not, are essential. To lose sight and grasp of them is truly the makings of trouble. There are sides to every truth, and this truth is cleaved with not only the reality that emotions are fundamental elements of our existence, but also the lived experience that they are painful flighty things we wish to rid.

To start with the latter calls on the experience of every sleepless, worried, bedraggled, haunted, overwhelmed, and neurotic soul who has fought to escape the madness inside their heads for some peace. That the woman in bed awake at all hours, terrorized by the visions of her past and feared future could bottle up the emotions that are rattling to be heard, is a tale every trauma survivor understands. There is also the person stuck in cycles of ritualistic obsession in the grips of OCD’s fears that has not breathed fully in too many years. We know these stories. We’ve lived them. Emotions can seem to be too much at times, yes.

And if left ignored, forced into a bottle, and howling, then (while they seem all powerful) we can also become disconnected from them. We can become numb to their voices, to feeling, to danger or defense. For what is emotion if not our brain and body making meaning of the world? OCD’s fears being a brain in overdrive on alert for danger; trauma’s visions a vigilant brain for safety or anger at boundaries once crossed.

At their core, every emotion is a message that will keep on knocking on our door to be heard or let in until we open up. They don’t go away any more than the stars in the sky, even if at times we may become numb. And while opening up may feel terrifying at first, it will and does ease as we listen–truly listen. In listening we learn when to follow the message, and when to unlearn old patterns and decide our own dangers.

Check out my latest IG series for each core emotion’s urge and response!